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The 12 days of a mish mash: the quiet thoughts

mishmash contemplations


..


I misbehaved and you didn’t

want to be there

and now I’m sorry, to a new you,

for anytime I’ve ever let you down

The bandit, who was outspoken

and brassy

I loop back and hide in fast forward

Reels take me back to empty

How dare I swing with my words

as well as my hair

I took Robbie’s Forbidden Roads

Second hand words

They said no

Shaking, I clenched

and saw it as a dare

I will prove you wrong

Now, I’ll never not care

Was my failure a mirage

Used, only, to control

Synthetic lighting stripped me

and I was no use

I never needed another excuse

For my brain to depart

I remember my frustration

‘Twas forever - and once

Comfort of a warming moment

Dreams of greater days

The connection

and what’s real, I feel

The moment that never gets old

Replaying the energies of your proof

Coming from insides

that back then, and forever, need warming

from the cold

I was a role play

From the soup.

Stuck. Hot hands clasping a mug of tea

I reached out for wagging tails

and relief

What you couldn’t bear

wasn’t manufactured me

He had all the softness, the falling fur

and the tender was crushed

when I gave momentary relief



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