17 'random' symptoms and signs that may* have been ADHD, prior to my late adult neurodivergent diagnosis
*not a medical professional. Just my thoughts and ideas.
1. If I’m in the back of a car and am talking to another passenger in the back seat, I cannot help but be VERY distracted by talking and activity in the front. My body and ears are split. I am not taking any pieces of information in, including the talking in the front of the car that I do not want to listen to!
2. Watching TV that I have seen before and know the ending to is comfortable and the dream. Even if I start watching a series, or something else that is new and mysterious to me, I need to have an idea of overall plotlines (if someone significant dies, for example) beforehand. I could still watch and enjoy, but do not like not knowing. The pre-watching rundown, I need.
3. Speaking of which, I am not a fan of horror films, shocks, instability and the unknown.
4. Often, I will hum random tunes, drum my fingers on any surface going and repetitively rub one foot against the other (as a comfort) in bed.
5. Other stims would include little noises that I had always tried to only do alone. The start of a cry, a ‘dramatic’ sigh or similar and, I suppose, animal – like sounds. I briefly whinny like a horse, reminding me of an animal’s shake down and release.
6. Standing still on the spot is PHYSICALLY PAINFUL. I tend to roll onto one side of my foot when being forced to be stationary – ish.
7. I cannot hide what I think on my face. Sometimes believing I can, I forget that I am very animated and that my expressions are legendary.
8. Background noises, people walking past me very closely and strong smells were hard to deal with. I wouldn’t often admit that to myself before.
9. Someone standing behind you in the bank or other important queue, being very close and breathing down your neck is EXCRUCIATING
10. Having a constant inner monologue or dialogue and that often resembling a washing machine cycling at a million miles per hour
11. Thinking through and reviewing options or choices, very quickly, before people are discussing them and, sometimes noting (in my head), that they are having the conversation you have already had internally.
12. Walking around in circles and pacing, when not quite sure of what action to take next.
13. Not being able to relax, well ever really. Not being able to relax and watch TV, for example without thinking ‘I should be..’ Words and sounds flowing through my mind constantly, some you can decipher, some not.
14. Talking at a loud volume and feeling shame when this is pointed out.
15. Tidying means putting things in piles. Things being out order feels very stressful (sometimes can’t get things done) but organising is so difficult. It’s superficially tidying, cleaning and placing things in ‘an area’, but in a way that is (or will soon be) chaotic, again.
16. Wanting to complete your sentence quickly, as you are afraid you will forget what it was.
17. Identifying with someone’s story and feeling excited with the connection. Then, relating it to something you have experienced and feeling shame, as many may think you ‘made it about you’. You genuinely do this to connect with the person and this feels buzzy and wonderful - being on the same wavelength about something.
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Write about ADHD and trauma on Instagram @taratalksthoughts
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